Last night I leaned over and gave Patty a kiss on top of her shiny head and it hit me… “She’s really dealing with cancer!” Please don’t get me wrong, we’ve been living this for the past six months, but last night was different. It really hit me… hard! The reality of all this came over me like a ton of bricks! I felt bad for her and very frustrated for both of us. I really want to fix this and make this go away for her, but I can’t. I think I may have been running on auto-pilot for the past six months. Having many years behind me in law enforcement, maybe my past training had taken over… whatever the problem is, handle it! Don’t let the emotional part get in the way! Just handle it!
We were delivered some very frustrating news yesterday. Without getting into specifics, Patty’s having some complications from the surgery. (Don’t worry, there’s no more cancer) The doctor feels they need to go back in to correct this problem. So, surgery is scheduled for this coming Monday, Oct. 18th. Surgery is at 1:00 p.m. and should take about an hour. They say she’ll come home that same day.
I’m really concerned about this procedure. Patty just had chemo this past Tuesday. If you remember my last post, I talked about how we’ve pretty much figured out how she’ll be feeling on a day-to-day basis over the next couple of weeks. Well, my guess is she’ll probably be really fatigued come Monday! Plus, they say that between day 7 through 14 following chemo, her white cells will be at their lowest and this is a time when she’s the most susceptible to infection. My question is… How will all that affect her recovery from the surgery? Another question I have is… Will this procedure delay her next chemo treatment? That’s the last thing we want! We’re on a schedule and really don’t want any delays! Patty put a call in to her Oncologist late yesterday to ask those specific questions. She hasn’t gotten back to us yet.
My hope is all this will be behind us come June 22, 2011 (Patty’s 1 year cancerversary). Our life will be somewhat back to normal and we’ll look back at all this and say “Man, that was really messed up!” (I do have another phrase for “messed up” but it’s probably not appropriate to put it in this post!)